Listen guys, we need to be honest with you: we got a little behind schedule and before we knew it, we didn’t have anything planned for today. So we whipped up a little homage to Ken Burns’ hair, because this thing has been befuddling us for ages. Bon appétit:
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"Mother puts the salad bowl over my head and tells me to keep still for 4 hours."
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Jesus fucking christ, am I right?
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"Give me that vintage Andre Agassi fam."
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You made those documentaries about civil war and baseball. You can afford a real haircut. Have you been to Fellow Barber in the West Village? It'll set you back $50 but they have some pretty talented stylists. I'm just saying Ken.
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James Van Der Beek called to remind you that middle parts can't actually fix everything, Burns.
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It doesn't seem that bad when you look at it from the side, but it is.
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This looks like one of those photos you're supposed to turn upside down and see something different...like an overly dimpled potato sitting in a bespoke terra cotta bowl.
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Who put Zach Braff on of those websites where show you what you're going to look like in 50 years?
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Some say Michael Jackson never died. And some may say Ken Burns never lived.
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We didn't zoom in on this because we didn't want to destroy the artistic integrity of this photograph. But still.
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We call this masterpiece "Grinning Bowl Cut Fuck."
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When you search for "Ken Burns' hair" this photograph of a restored old car shows up. Pretty neat, huh?
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It's not cool to look like a school shooter when you're in your 60s, Ken.
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Welp, you asked for all these zoom-ins on Ken Burns' hair. And you god damn got them.
